From the 2nd floor of Alden Library I bring to you Saturday Night Live: a cultural experience!
.....A cultural experience? What? How?
You see, the highly diversified environment of students spending their Saturday evening in the Learning Commons could not possibly be anything short of a cultural phenomenon. Floor number two is more than just a place where students can come work. It's much more complicated than that. These noble souls choose to spend their evening laboring for the sake of this educational institution. Noble souls? Choose? Yes, these words seem problematic to me, too. These poor losers are forced to forfeit a night at the bars so they don't flunk out. Each of these unfortunate individuals fall into subcategories based on the spatial construction of floor number 2 of Hell. Now who makes up Alden's SNL cast?
First there are the tables. There are the foreign-born Asian students studying in groups, the individuals diligently working alone, the pairs of girls or couples doing more talking than studying and then the loners that are just staring into space. Then there are the group study rooms. There are the small groups sitting and talking, however, soundproof rooms prohibit us from judging their levels of academic efficiency. Then there are the larger groups that are professionally reviewing slideshows and excel documents that serve to remind you why being an economics or business major would blow. There are the circles of computers. Here we have the student who is just staring at a blank Word document followed by the student that has the Word document with their name, class, date and title typed. Then there are those that are obsessively checking blackboard and Catmail as a less-guilty mode of procrastination. Next we have those on Facebook followed by those that are trying to conceal being on Facebook. There are others with their work spread in front of them and intensely stare at the task at hand as they shamelessly eat and crumple wrappers/drink/text/search for another escape. Oh, there are also a few that are successfully working. There are the floaters and other miscellaneous individuals. There John and Jane are standing at the printer and waiting the five minutes for it to warm up because people watching is better than 5 more minutes of homework. Can't forget the other John and Jane that are going to the restroom every 5-10 minutes, most likely just for something to do. There are the few older individuals that you question. Grad students? Faculty? Townies? There is nothing comfortable about sitting next to the individual you think you should be institutionalized. Mhm, the one walking around talking to herself, the same one you that follows you down an alley uptown and freaks your stuff a bit. There is also not much that is comforting about sitting next to the guy that is mumbling to and laughing at the computer screen. Nor does the older guy that is making those mysterious calls about his unidentified posting on Craigslist give me those fuzzy feelings. But without them would this really be a Saturday night at Alden? Yes, probably. But it is the mysticism and complexity of the environment that provide for an unforgettable Saturday night.
Still convinced SNL@Alden is not the cultural experience you want next weekend? If you answered anything but "yes" I must conclude we are sufficiently incompatible.
.....A cultural experience? What? How?
You see, the highly diversified environment of students spending their Saturday evening in the Learning Commons could not possibly be anything short of a cultural phenomenon. Floor number two is more than just a place where students can come work. It's much more complicated than that. These noble souls choose to spend their evening laboring for the sake of this educational institution. Noble souls? Choose? Yes, these words seem problematic to me, too. These poor losers are forced to forfeit a night at the bars so they don't flunk out. Each of these unfortunate individuals fall into subcategories based on the spatial construction of floor number 2 of Hell. Now who makes up Alden's SNL cast?
First there are the tables. There are the foreign-born Asian students studying in groups, the individuals diligently working alone, the pairs of girls or couples doing more talking than studying and then the loners that are just staring into space. Then there are the group study rooms. There are the small groups sitting and talking, however, soundproof rooms prohibit us from judging their levels of academic efficiency. Then there are the larger groups that are professionally reviewing slideshows and excel documents that serve to remind you why being an economics or business major would blow. There are the circles of computers. Here we have the student who is just staring at a blank Word document followed by the student that has the Word document with their name, class, date and title typed. Then there are those that are obsessively checking blackboard and Catmail as a less-guilty mode of procrastination. Next we have those on Facebook followed by those that are trying to conceal being on Facebook. There are others with their work spread in front of them and intensely stare at the task at hand as they shamelessly eat and crumple wrappers/drink/text/search for another escape. Oh, there are also a few that are successfully working. There are the floaters and other miscellaneous individuals. There John and Jane are standing at the printer and waiting the five minutes for it to warm up because people watching is better than 5 more minutes of homework. Can't forget the other John and Jane that are going to the restroom every 5-10 minutes, most likely just for something to do. There are the few older individuals that you question. Grad students? Faculty? Townies? There is nothing comfortable about sitting next to the individual you think you should be institutionalized. Mhm, the one walking around talking to herself, the same one you that follows you down an alley uptown and freaks your stuff a bit. There is also not much that is comforting about sitting next to the guy that is mumbling to and laughing at the computer screen. Nor does the older guy that is making those mysterious calls about his unidentified posting on Craigslist give me those fuzzy feelings. But without them would this really be a Saturday night at Alden? Yes, probably. But it is the mysticism and complexity of the environment that provide for an unforgettable Saturday night.
Still convinced SNL@Alden is not the cultural experience you want next weekend? If you answered anything but "yes" I must conclude we are sufficiently incompatible.
I thought I posted a comment but it didn't work so I will try to replicate my comment. "Hilarious! The people that secretly check their facebook are the funniest. I just had a group of girls use the elevator to go down one floor. Always something new in Alden."
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